Sunday, September 19, 2010

Team Zombie Strikes Again

Welcome, my beloved Bloats - to another grisly gathering of Team Zombie! Do shuffle in and make yourselves at home, there's a good team!
For your delicate digestion, we've prepared a humble treat:

Sullivan McPig has generously donated an ENTIRE unicorn brain which Velvet sauteed to putrefied perfection in an aromatic mixture of foxglove & hemlock! Aren't our ghouls simply mah-velous?! Let's give the girls a big hand (Ted, that was a metaphor... return Zombie Girrl's arm this instant!).

One must admit we zombies are the undisputed gourmets of the graveyard, are we not?! Who says we are but mindless, moldering hordes, all brawn and no brain? Why, Team Zombie simply REEKS of brains, do we not?! (...will someone explain the joke to Ted?).

Now then. While Lexie and Ashley pass around the plates, and Titania hands out napkins, everyone look under your stones. There you will each find a copy of our latest additions to the already burgeoning world of Undead Literature & Art!

(sigh ...UNDER the stone, Ted. Yes. You'll have to get up FIRST, there's a bright fellow).

I shall now read aloud from my own copy. Anyone with suggestions do feel free to mark them in the comment section.



The Oxford Dictionary of Embalming Techniques

Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Zombie Sex But Were To Squeamish To Ask

The Gizzard of Oz

Gone With The Wendigo

The Catcher On The Rye With Mayo

(Way) Beneath The Good Earth

Lord of The Blow Flies

The Sound and The Fury of Flatulence

Silas Marner's Mortuary

A Separate Piece

1984 Bites


Wee Willie Stinky Winkie

This Old Man (had brittle bones)

Twinkle, Twinkle Little Shroud

Ten Little Indian Burial Grounds

Yankee Doodle Ate My Poodle

There Was An Old Woman (Who Died In a Shoe)

Rub a Dub Grub - Three Heads By The Shrub

Scary Mary White & Hairy

Mary Had a Little Lamb's Liver

Jack and Jill Crawled Up The Hill

The Farmer In The Well

It's Raining, It's Pouring, My Dead Uncle's Snoring

Little Bo Peep Marinated Her Sheep


The Six-Million Dollar Maggot

Rules of Derangement

Saturday Night Dead

How I Buried Your Mother

So You Think You Can Dig

Creeping Up On The Kardashians

The Offal Office

The Buzzards of Waverly Place



There now. Wasn't that frightful fun?! Ah, it does a body good to bask in the worm companionship of one's pestilent peers.

Please be so kind as to deposit your plates and napkins in the casket on the way out (he's WHAT? Egad! ... in the casket? ... oh dear heaven ... TED STOP THAT THIS INSTANT! Put your bone away ... there's a good lad!)


  1. Oh, i want to watch 'so you think you can dig'!!

  2. Haha! Two of my favorite shows are i8Carly and Buzzards of Waverly Place! XD