Showing posts with label mid-life crisis. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mid-life crisis. Show all posts

Saturday, October 23, 2010

I Need Your Input!

Maybe I'm feeling a certain way because I'm under the weather with a seasonal allergy that gives every indication of quickly turning into a full-blown sinus infection.

You know how it goes. The headache day after day, eyes sensitive to light, dizzy when you tilt your head, sneezing, throat ache, body aches, out of body experience (I wish! lol).

So anyway. I don't know if I'm merely feeling funky or at some bizarre mid-life crisis thing?

But for the last year, I've struggled with the concept of minimalism. You know - frugal, basic living. Ridding myself of STUFF: clutter, figurines, knick-knacks, excess furniture, dishes, bowls, cookware, yard crap, old books I've collected, vintage jewelry, Christmas collectibles and on and on and on.

I don't know if I'm just feeling my age/mortality (okay, it IS only a sinus bug!) ... or is something deeper at work - an inner dissatisfaction simmering under the surface?

Mind you, I'm not remotely what you'd call a hoarder. If anything, I'm a very tidy, organized individual. A typical Virgo you might say, with a place for everything and everything in its place.

Still though, I'm feeling overwhelmed these days. My place is small and I've (once again) acquired more than I'm comfortable with.

My question is this: Do you ever REALLY feel the urge to chuck at least half of what you've got? Do you guys ever feel practically burdened by having to move stuff, clean stuff, shift stuff around, rearrange stuff, pack up stuff, sort stuff, and so on?
Have you ever seriously considered downsizing your home, your life - to take a hard-nosed no-nonsense look at what's really worth keeping as opposed to what you've gotten into the habit of holding onto?

Do you get tired of being a 'consumer'? Of bringing MORE stuff into your home?

I dunno. Maybe it's just my current mood.

But on the other hand, consider the following:

1) You can't take your stuff with you, whenever that time comes. My kids don't really share my taste in old, vintage antique crap. They don't start drooling over a 1960 Mid-Century Modern pole lamp. Actually, I think they'd rather p*ss glass than have to deal with any of my collectibles down the road. So who am I holding onto all this for? Me, I guess. But is this really what my life's all about? Stuff?

2) Is the economy going to worsen? If so, would I be better to try and sell off the excess and get while the getting's good? Because the sad truth of the matter is that no matter WHAT the fair market value of any item supposedly is, it's only true worth is what someone is willing to pay.

Furthermore, I have these altruistic fantasies. Like working in a soup kitchen. Except we're a small town, I'm somewhat disabled, and there's not too much I can find/am physically able to do in that regard. But I'm sincerely feeling the desire to pay it forward - somehow.

This sounds totally ludicrous, but when reading literature from the early 20Th century, I'm always envious of those adventurous characters who backpacked or bicycled across Europe in the those days. Paying their way via odd jobs and seeing the world via the back roads of small hamlets and villages, farms and vineyards. Can you imagine?!

Even a decade ago when I was still somewhat able to walk my brains out, I had the inner desire to put my life on hold and set off across the US. Not by car, you understand. But by foot, with all my simple needs carried on my back. Just to do it, to have that experience. (In all honesty, I probably would've made it 40 miles, gotten a blister and decided to chuck the whole goofy idea for a hot bath and civilization lol).

So that's what I mean. Am I just being silly, or moody, or is something vital seeking expression? The way I feel right now, 2/3rds of what I own could go bye bye for all I care. Maybe my system's low on chocolate (egad!)~

What about you guys? Ever feel like this? And if so, what do you do about it?